Dance Dance Revolution

My girlfriend Sarah and I had the opportunity to go to, not one, but two swing dancing events this past weekend. For the past month we had planned on attending “Music and Romance,” a fancy schmancy dance put on by Otterbein college. But somehow Sarah also convinced me to attend a swing dance class at the Vineyard with her the night previous. The swing dance class was actually a ’singles outreach event’ in disguise. The majority of the attendees weren’t even single- they were middle-aged, married couples looking for something fun to do on the weekend. Needless to say, it wasn’t my idea of a hot night out on the town. But Sarah insisted we go to practice for Music and Romance. We could have practiced five nights in a row and I still wouldn’t have been ready to dance with Sarah.

You know that dancing game “Dance Dance Revolution”- the one with the pad and arrows that you stomp on? That’s not really dancing. I’m good at that. Real dancing requires actual rhythm. I can cheat in DDR and use my foot-eye coordination to stomp when the arrow enters the little box. Sarah has taken several dance classes and plays the piano (very well might I add). She has actual rhythm. I have watched the TV show So You Think You Can Dance and played the arrow stomping game-DDR. I’m a nerd that can’t really dance. Not to mention, Sarah is an avid feminist so she doesn’t take kindly to the whole “guy always leads” idea. Here is an example of a conversation between me and Sarah as we tried to learn to dance together:

Sarah: “Triple step, triple step, back step, now do the double hair comb Robby.”

Robby: “Let me lead.”

Sarah: “Okay………………now you are going to spin me.”

Robby: “(Exhale)”

Looking back on this past weekend, however, I am glad I attended the free dance lessons with Sarah. I improved a lot between Friday and Saturday night. An older lady even told me she liked my moves on the dance floor. Little did she know, I wasn’t actually leading. Sarah was the one making me look good.

Brandon, Maria, Sarah, and I at Music and Romance.

REAL DANCING

ARROW STOMPING FAKE DANCING

Watch Your Mouth!

 

Have you ever had one of those moments where you mean to say one thing but it comes out sounding completely different? Earlier this evening I had one of those moments. My friend and I were having a conversation downstairs in the living room of our house about a Human Sexuality class he was taking this quarter at Otterbein. (One of the class requirements was that each student ask his or her parent(s) about a sexual topic they never would have discussed with them as a teenager but were comfortable discussing now. My friend had no desire to do so. I remember last year taking the sex class and having the very same conversation with my dad. I won’t go into the details of the conversation. But let me just say, it was very “enlightning.”) 

While sitting at the computer, my friend pulls up a slide show from the Human Sexuality class displaying a diagram of the male anatomy. He and I proceed to make a couple off-colored jokes about the drawings, much to the chagrin of the other people in the room. Then he seamlessly transitions from looking at pictures diagraming the male anatomy, to pictures of he and his ex-girlfriend on Facebook. Mind you, I am one of the few people in the room that can see the computer screen at this point. After pulling up a couple of pictures from a date he and his girlfriend went on a couple of years back, he looks over to me and exclaims, “These are some pictures she and I took together two years ago when we were still together.” It was a completely innocent statement to me- the only person able to see the computer screen. The pictures were cute. They both were fully clothed, laughing, and sitting outside in the grass. The other six people in the room still thought we were talking about sex and the male anatomy. I peer across the room only to see one young lady from our group horrified. “You what?” she cried. “What did you do? Are we still talking about the same thing?” We both laugh. Then quickly explain what happened. For that one moment, however, it was great to see our friends reactions as their opinions of my friend crumbled to the ground.

 Later that evening, while reading my marketing textbook, I stumbled upon a section titled “Real Marketing: Watch Your Language.” The article was devoted to listing the many marketing blunders companies had made as they attempted to transition from their domestic market to other foreign markets. I couldn’t help but laugh outloud at some of these ridiculous gaffes so I am going to share some of them with you right now. I hope you get a good laugh.

-) When Coca-Cola first marketed Coke in China in the 1920’s, it developed a group of Chinese characters that, when pronounced, sounded like the product name. Unfortunately, the characters actually translated as “bite the wax tadpole.” Now, the characters on Chinese Coke bottles translate as “happiness in the mouth.”

-) Chevy’s Nova translated into Spanish as no va- “it doesn’t go.”

-) IKEA marketed a children’s workbench in America named FARTFULL (the word means “speedy” in Swedish)- it soon discontinued the product.

-) Other product names you won’t likey see in your local Speedway: Krapp toilet paper (Denmark), Crapsy Fruit cereal (France), Poo curry poweder (Argentina), and (excuse the language) Pschitt Lemonade (France).

Advertising themes often lose-or gain- something in the translation. The Coors beer slogan “get loose with Coors” in Spanish came out as “get the runs with Coors.” Other exmaples of this include:

-) Coca Cola’s “Coke adds life” theme in Japanese translated into “Coke brings your ancestors back from the dead.” (HAHA)

-) The milk industry learned too late that its American advertising question “Got Milk?” translated in Mexico as a more provocative “Are you lactating?”

-) In Chinese, the KFC slogan “finger-lickin’ good” came out as “eat your fingers off.”

-) And Frank Perdue’s classic line, “It takes a tough man to make a tender chicken,” took on added meaning in Spanish: “It takes an aroused man to make a chicken affectionate.”

 That’s all for this week.

My blog is not dead…

 

…but my dog is. This past weekend I lost my closest, most dependable friend from the past nine years of my life, my dog Baby. On Saturday, January 12, 2008, at nine and a half years old, Baby died from what was believed to be kidney disease. She was an amazing dog. Despite being a rotwiler, she was very affectionate and protective of her family. My family would often joke that Baby was a puppy trapped in a big dog’s body. Because she thought she was a lap dog, Baby was well known for her tendency to jump on unknowing visitors’ laps. Baby will not be forgotten. She has left a legacy through both our memories and her children. Believe it or not, Baby mated with our other dog Snoopy, a dachshund, and produced a healthy litter of puppies. They were goofy looking puppies, but puppies nevertheless. She will be remembered for her playful attitude and fun loving personality

Baby was there for me through some of the most difficult times in a boy’s life. I remember the first time I met her. I was eleven years old, visiting my Pawpaw’s house down in New Orleans. She was only a puppy then. She was so playful and cuddly. Little did I know that I would be cuddling up to this dog for the next nine years of my life. Baby accompanied me through middle school, high school, and half of college. She truly was this man’s best friend. She was a big dog by breed but small in comparison to other rotwilers. She was the runt of litter. Nevertheless, she offered lots of heat on cold winter nights and security to a young, scared boy on those windy nights when the house creaked.  She had some of the most beautiful, brown eyes I have ever seen. I will hold the memory of Baby close to my heart until I die. I love you Baby.

If any of you have a special memory of Baby that you would like to share, I would love to relive it with you. Please comment and tell. 

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To everyone that reads my blog, I am sorry if this post was a little self-indulgent of me. I hope to get back to discussing deeper issues soon. I am back at Otterbein for Winter quarter, but I will still be posting on this blog. I hope to do it weekly at a minimum. I love hearing everyone’s feedback and I love being apart of the discussions a blog like this can generate.